Gardens in Common
This past week my husband and I celebrated our anniversary. In all honesty it was weird for both of us to look at each other and think twelve years. Even though we got married very young (Joshua at twenty-one, I at eighteen) and have been together over a third of our lives, twelve just sounds like too big a number at this point in our lives. We had to laugh.
Getting married young has its advantages. We bought our first house together when I was nineteen and were so distracted with each other throughout those college years that we stayed focused on what we wanted for our lives and out of trouble. Having children young also has its advantages. It feels good to be fitter after having twins than before and knowing that I’ll only be forty when our girls graduate from high school.
Still, the flipside of literally growing up together as a married couple is that while we’ve developed into who we now are over the last twelve years side by side, our interests and personalities have not always continued in the same direction. I write, dance, and love wine, travel, and Spanish. Joshua builds guitars, welds, and likes camping, cars, and silence. When I asked him last weekend what we had in common his answer was simple. “Kids.” After we both laughed, there was one other thing we decided we could completely agree on. We have gardens in common.
Landscape architecture and design is what we can talk about for hours. We’ve visited countless gardens together in California and Europe, some of our favorite memories made together when walking through different landscapes alone. While our preferences vary in style, music, and eye color, in the garden we agree. Outside our tastes meld together into one without much compromise. At home our garden is in a major transition, not exactly what either of us wants, but getting closer. Joshua sketches revised plans as we slowly transform our wild plot of land into a place to relax, cook, and play. Because when it comes down to it, we both are happier outside. One more thing in common.
Getting married young has its advantages. We bought our first house together when I was nineteen and were so distracted with each other throughout those college years that we stayed focused on what we wanted for our lives and out of trouble. Having children young also has its advantages. It feels good to be fitter after having twins than before and knowing that I’ll only be forty when our girls graduate from high school.
Still, the flipside of literally growing up together as a married couple is that while we’ve developed into who we now are over the last twelve years side by side, our interests and personalities have not always continued in the same direction. I write, dance, and love wine, travel, and Spanish. Joshua builds guitars, welds, and likes camping, cars, and silence. When I asked him last weekend what we had in common his answer was simple. “Kids.” After we both laughed, there was one other thing we decided we could completely agree on. We have gardens in common.
Landscape architecture and design is what we can talk about for hours. We’ve visited countless gardens together in California and Europe, some of our favorite memories made together when walking through different landscapes alone. While our preferences vary in style, music, and eye color, in the garden we agree. Outside our tastes meld together into one without much compromise. At home our garden is in a major transition, not exactly what either of us wants, but getting closer. Joshua sketches revised plans as we slowly transform our wild plot of land into a place to relax, cook, and play. Because when it comes down to it, we both are happier outside. One more thing in common.
posted by Tyler Oaks at
8:23 PM
1 Comments:
Happy Anniversary! And Happy Gardening! I will give you my garden list:
1. Favorite Garden Book "The Secret Garden"
2. Favorite Garden in Modesto "Lotus Gardens" on McHenry
3. Favorite thing to do in a garden: "Read"
4. Best thing about working in a garden: "Getting my hands dirty".
5. Garden essentials: A Gazebo, A cat or two, and great places to read.
6. Last thing I bought for a garden: A Sundial.
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